A Message of Hope

This post is going to be pretty long, but I really wanted to share the message our minister gave at Kristin's funeral. Lord, may this message of hope, bless each person who reads it. Thru Jesus I pray, Amen.

This is a not a sad, doom & gloom, awful day. Kristin is gone, and part of Mark & Jodi’s heart is missing because she’s gone. But this is a day to glorify God, because Kristin is finally complete and whole.
When Kristin was born, everything started out as doom and gloom. Jodi’s dreams for her little girl – dressing her up, doing her hair, involving her in tap dance classes and cheerleading – all of that was lost. These losses hurt down deep. In the beginning, all the focus was on these losses.
There were joys. When Kristin was at home, Mark would hold her and let her snuggle in. She would finally relax and go to sleep. There were the times when Mark, Jodi, Dustin, Kristin’s nurse Caulvette and Kristin would all huddle together watching the Colts play football. Later, at the Nursing Home, Kristin progressed. With all of the wonderful people there caring for her, Kristin gained some. Her Teacher’s helped her so Kristin could listen to music and watch her TV. There were joys. But it has been a long road for Mark & Jodi to be able to see God’s glory shown through Kristin’s life.
Jodi commented that she was just a new Christian when Kristin was born. She hadn’t gotten into Scripture much. And her losses were really hard for her. She didn’t understand why God did this. What was she being punished for? As time went on, Mark and his family and close friends in the Church, would say things about Kristin that Jodi didn’t understand. “Even though I hurt,” Jodi said, “I knew down deep there had to be answers to my questions.”
One day early on when Kristin hadn’t been in the Nursing Home long, Mark’s brother Paul said to Jodi: “She’s such a blessing in your life.” This hurt Jodi; she thought, “You have no idea what it’s like. I don’t consider her a blessing.” Paul sensed Jodi’s hurt and said, “One day you will realize it.” “And now,” Jodi says, “that’s exactly what she is. I understand now.”
Things began to come together for her when Jodi started to read the Bible. The Bible said this life would not be easy. It said God would refine us. All of this spoke as evidence to Jodi that God was working in their lives through Kristin.
For example, the Bible says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Jesus said, “‘Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back & take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going. Thomas said to him, ‘Lord, we don't know where you are going, so how can we know the way?’ Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.’”
When people go to the Especially Kids Nursing Home – Kristin’s home away from home – they usually react saying, “How sad, how terrible it is.” And they find it hard to look at the residents there. Early on when Mark used to look at Kristin all he could see were her deformities, and it bothered him.
Mark said, “God is holy; we’re not. When God looks on us, he sees our deformities. Without Christ in us, God’s reaction to us would be, “How sad, how terrible it is.” But because of His love for us, God our Father looks past our imperfections as if they were not there. This insight helped Mark look at Kristin differently. He didn’t focus on her deformities. He didn’t focus on how terrible she looked. As her father, Mark looked on his beloved daughter. He looked for the twinge of a smile on her face.
Mark commented, “Satan tries to use things against us. He wants us to see the negative. He doesn’t want us to see what God sees. Because of Christ, when God looks on me, He doesn’t see my sins & failures; He sees His Son. How amazing this is!”
The Bible says, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”
Jodi said, “God allowed what happened to Kristin, and He used it for good. God didn’t cause it. It happened because we live in a fallen world. Sometimes God heals people & shows His glory that way. Other times, He doesn’t heal people. God knew He could show more of His glory by letting Kristin live 10 years. Without this, I would never have learned what I did. God used Kristin to give me a faith that I would not trade for anything.
“God can bring good out of the suffering of a fallen world. He used Kristin’s suffering, and He uses our suffering for good. It took me a long time to get to this point in my faith. When Kristin would get sick & struggle, when she had to be poked with needles, when she suffered convulsions, spasms, and contortions, I would ask, ‘Why?’ But what God witnessed when His own Son suffered for us was worse. God didn’t spare His Son.”
“Now,” Mark said, “Kristin is free. One of her favorite videos was Spirit. She liked the part where as a young horse, Spirit ran free in the wild. Now, she is finally free. When I see Kristin next, I will see her there in heaven. We will worship the Lord together. And I’m not going to remember her having a G-tube or a trachea tube. She will be perfect. I will see her enjoying her time with her Father and with her Savior. Right now, I see her anticipating when we will be with her. She is in eternity experiencing amazing things with Christ that we can’t imagine.”
Jodi pictures Kristin walking, talking, singing, & dancing! When the music in her videos and on her tape player started up, Kristin would kick her legs, her eyes would get big, she would swing her body. She loved to move! Kristin first began smiling when we moved her, like when we picked her up. Then she began to smile at her tickle me Elmo, at her dancing hamster, and at her Sesame Street guitar player. Jodi remembers rewinding the video ‘Cats and Dogs’ over and over to a specific part that made Kristin smile every time she heard it. And that was fun.
A couple of weeks ago, Jodi wrote, “I began a new Bible study called ‘Living Beyond Yourself.’ One day’s study was called ‘Crucified’ which explored characteristics of the Crucified Life. One of those characteristics is: You must accept that death is painful.
“As I read this, I instantly thought about Kristin and what my urgent plea and struggle has been. ‘Lord, please just take her and don’t allow her to suffer anymore.’ During these last weeks, I have endured watching her suffer, regress and raise many unanswerable questions. I just want God to take her peacefully and her to not suffer. But as I read the Scripture, I was so struck that I can't have it both ways. Death is pain and the pain, agony and suffering Jesus endured for me, was horrible for God the Father to watch too. He understands my pain. But I need to focus on God's Will and not my own. I have been so selfish saying in essence, ‘God, You take Kristin, but don't make her suffer. Do it my way, because I know best!’
“This brings me to the final characteristic: ‘Because He was forsaken, you never will be. To forsake means to quit, to abandon, to leave behind, to cease from. Because Jesus paid the penalty for all the sins of the world, God will never abandon Kristin. That is the one thing she will never have to endure as part of her suffering. She will be absent from the body, present with the Lord. It will be instantaneous. The hardest thing as a parent, is seeing your child suffer. We want to make their pain go away right now. We want to bear the pain for them. But most times, this is impossible. I have really questioned how much she would suffer, but now I see that that is exactly what God had to do. He had to watch his one and only Son suffer - so that we could live. I am going to have to see Kristin suffer, so that she can live, eternally with the only One who can take away her pain and suffering. I can't - He can... and will.”
God is gracious. Mark said, “When it was time for Kristin to go, God did answer our prayers. She was very quiet and calm on Wednesday, and she just slipped away.”
Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this? Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?” In Kristin we have seen it.

Prayer - God, our Father, we thank You for Kristin. We thank You for what you have done for us through her. And I thank You, Lord, for what you did for Kristin through Mark and Jodi, through Dustin, through all of the staff at Especially Kids, and through her family and friends who loved her. Lord, You have shown that you can bring good even out of sorrow. Bring Your good again now. This we pray in Christ’s name. Amen.